Atlanta, GA – As people begin to gather outside the Kenosha courthouse eagerly awaiting the Kyle Rittenhouse verdict, the Biden administration has recommended the Covid-19 booster shot to those who plan on peacefully burning down the city.
“It just makes sense to those who decide to gather in large groups.” The head of CDC explained. “The peaceful protesters who plan on peacefully destroying small businesses need to protect themselves against the dangerous and deadly Covid-19 virus.”
“We’re not out of the pandemic yet, folks.” Press secretary, Jen Psaki, added at the press conference. “We know that those Americans who plan on using shopping carts to ram into store windows won’t have time to sanitize them. So being triple vaccinated is their best option to stay healthy.”
The CDC has also encouraged people to get a shot on whichever arm is the least dominant. “The last thing we’d want you to do is go out there hurling Molotov cocktails with a sore shoulder.”
As of this report the CVS drug stores that are offering the free booster shot are currently being burned to the ground by protesters.
