Kabul – ISIS-K honored U.S. President Joe Biden with the Congressional Medal of Honor for his recent drone strikes which, mistakingly took out innocent Afghan civilians.
The ceremony was held at an undisclosed location just outside of Kabul.
“We want to thank the president for his continued support against our enemies- innocent Afghan women and children!” An ISIS representative announced.
“So much to thank him for. The hasty withdrawal, leaving some cool weapons behind, his lack of a counterterrorism plan.” Another ISIS member added. “Thank you Mr. President for putting the fear of America into blameless civilians and making our job just that much easier.”
The small crowd applauded as the Congressional Medal was placed around Biden’s neck even though ISIS doesn’t even have a congress let alone honor.
“I want to thank my family, my friends…you ever watch Friends?” Biden uttered during his acceptance speech. “The show with Chandler and Kramer. Not Chandler. It’s Ross, man! You know the thing. With the monkey!”
The ceremony ended as Biden attempted to unwrap his Medal because he thought there was chocolate inside.