Hollywood, CA – Using state of the art digital technology MGM Studios has removed every single horse from the 1959 Charlton Heston adventure epic, Ben-Hur.
“After we witnessed racists horses whipping immigrants at the border we knew we had to act.” Head of MGM Studios, James Murren, announced. “We also plan on replacing Charlton Heston with Larry David if enough people complain on Twitter.” Murren said in response to the accusations of a Christian actor playing a Jewish character.
“Oh, and to those that say Mr. Heston would be rolling over in his grave, I can assure you that you’re absolutely wrong because he was cremated!” The CEO smugly added with a chuckle.
“We first attempted to replace the horses with Tesla’s” a senior special effects tech lamented, “But realized how stupid that is because electricity wasn’t invented in the 1st century.”
The White House was quick to respond. “President Biden already has plans to pop this in his VCR when he’s done watching Boondock Saints 2.” Press secretary Jen Psaki confirmed when asked if Biden approves of removing these horrific horse bigots.
Other major film studios have also taken similar steps. Universal has pulled Seabiscuit (2003) from shelves and HBO is currently working on digitally removing Sarah Jessica Parkers face from Sex And The City.
